Otis Regrets... or not

JC Penney “splashy march” promo

Splashy March cover — splashy march cover from jcp. The jcp logo in the shirt collar has been Photoshopped out but a loose thread at the botom right of the shirt remains.

I’m not a JCP customer nor prospect. I didn’t watch the Oscars so didn’t see the Ellen ads though I just now YouTubed them and thought they were great (unlike the majority of the TV audience apparently). Thus, like a lot of folks, my first exposure to the “NEW” JCP was the insert in today’s Sunday paper. If you have one, pull it aside before your partner or spouse puts it in the recycling because it’s worth a study.

JCP’s competition in my local mall includes Target, Old Navy and Kohl’s, all value brands that are trying to look cool and hip (Kohl’s less so than the others) while maximizing floor space. What’s going to make me take a fresh look at the “new” JCP now that former Apple (and Target) guy Ron Johnson has had a few months to get settled in?

How about an opening spread that announces the new “Fair and Square” pricing and uses a universal commodity, like polo shirts, to illustrate it? Red is everyday, white is month long values, blue is a markdown. Got it. So let’s show one example of each. Let’s also make a great offer to get people back in the store, like a free 8×10 family portrait with no strings attached.

This isn’t what happens. The opening spread sells nothing except the picture of a mom in heels (presumably purchased at JCP, but with the intent of looking like Manolo Blahniks) who is gearing up her toddler for a splash in their inground pool visible through the open doorway. Goofy, yes. JCP customer, no. We do get to the polos but not until the next spread, and without the pricing explanation. Further, they’re not on models and they’re still shots, wrinkled. Questionable choice since JCP’s new image seems to focus on “fun” people and models work very well later in the book while also showing off the product with bright hide-no-detail lighting.

I actually sat down to talk about the copy though. I wrote retail fashion early in my career and it’s hard. But at the core of the “look” there is always a human benefit to be found. The book title, “splashy march”, simply doesn’t make sense unless it’s an in joke about “merch”. The double meaning instinct moves into high gear a couple of spreads later: “when we say we’ve got you covered we really mean it… talk about a spring break!” (As in price, apparently. But wait a minute. Doesn’t JCP’s new positioning focus on the fact there is NOT always a sale going on?)

Adult supervision finally arrives at the soft goods section in the back: “This shower curtain is not only washable, it also resists mildew. What is it about spring that makes you want a fresh, clean start?” On message and it sells. What’s so hard about that? Watch and learn, JCP fashion copywriter.

And that free portrait offer? It’s here on the inside back cover (actually a hot spot that’s one of the most-read spreads in a catalog) but buried next to a wacky family portrait that again will probably make the JCP customer feel uncomfortable vs thinking “those are my peeps.”

I kept thinking about the great Lands End catalogs of yesteryear, before they were acquired by Sears. Great selling and great stories hand in hand, with the latter used to showcase the former. That was what JCP could have used here.

UPDATE: since this post we’ve seen three more Sunday flyers from JCP. The “mandarin orange” fashion issue was great. The home store this week not so much. Also, the binding was different: saddle stitched for fashion, loose pages for the home issue. What’s happening is a lot of territorialism between different creative directors and the different departments. For a messaging re-do like this to work, you really do need to have buy-in across the board.

World Wildlife Foundation bags it in new promo

I may have been a bit tough on World Wildlife Federation in my last diatribe. (Though it’s fascinating how many people search for “should we let the tiger go extinct?”) So instead of slamming their new direct mail deck, I’m going to assume there was a bit of slippage between the creative brief and the execution and suggest some ways they can tighten it up.

On the front of the OE (the most important part of the entire package by far) we have the teaser, “Say no to plastic bags! See inside to learn how….” There’s a WWF logo as a corner card but it could just as easily have been WTF since it’s a complete disconnect with the teaser. On the back we have…. Plastic bags! Four of them, your gift when you “Show the World You’re Helping to Save the Environment” (note the Needless Use of Title Case, a telltale sign that nobody is minding the store).

I can see the copywriter and designer brainstorming this concept… sort of like the songwriting team in Smash, sticking index cards on a board then standing back and regarding them with furrowed brow… while the account director mutters in the background like a hapless Greek chorus.

Copywriter: “Here’s an idea. Lots of people would like to stop using plastic bags but they have no idea how. Let’s show them!” Designer: “I love it! Plus, we’re giving away our own plastic bag as a premium. Since we know they’re into plastic bags, let’s send them four instead of one.” Account director: “Doesn’t that send a mixed message? And what does that have to do with saving wildlife anyway. Oh, never mind…”

Inside, it comes together somewhat. There’s a buckslip that explains when you get your totes you’ll “carry them everywhere and help reduce the use of plastic bags.” And if you’re looking for the connection between wildlife and plastic bags, you’ll find it near the bottom of the first page of the letter, sort of: “The average American uses 350 plastic bags each year. And they don’t just end up in landfills… they end up in oceans, too. Every year more than 100,000 whales, seals, turtles and birds die as a result of plastic bags.”

WWFinside — Inside the WWF "plastic bags" promo

I turn the letter over, looking for details, and there are none. I know about the ghost sea of floating plastic in the Pacific off Hawaii, larger than Rhode Island. I imagine there are some ghastly Greenpeace-type tales to be told of birds getting their beaks caught in plastic bags, or animals choking on them. But the WWF copywriter does not bring it home with these details because they seem to have taken a vow about saying anything that may seem too harsh or negative. But wait a minute. Aren’t we raising funds for an environmental not-for-profit? Isn’t making people feel the pain what it’s all about?

I think the original assignment was “build a package around our free tote bags”. This is already a challenge because there is not an obvious and immediate connection between tote bags and wildlife. Somebody then decided to make it “educational” by helping people “learn” how to stop using disposable bags… that’s a rather condescending message to this audience which I expect is already environmentally savvy. And education in general (this package also has a “special insert” I am supposed to read called “10 Simple Things YOU Can Do to Help PROTECT the Earth”) is a deadly tactic for direct response. They aren’t going to stick around till the end of class, so you better ask them to reach for their wallet as soon as the tardy bell rings.

Really, the only way to make this package work is the simple logic of a/plastic bags kill animals b/here are some grisly ways c/you can stop the suffering by accepting our free gift. But the WWF’s creative team is into happy talk so they can’t do that. Time to bring in a new game warden.

The ultimate great client… my dad

My dad died a few days ago, peacefully, at the age of 96. As we prepared for the memorial service, I talked to a number of people who had worked with him over the years in his capacities as director and editor of the Southern Methodist University Press, publisher of the Southwest Review, and book editor of the Dallas Morning News.

I knew about his own personal trial during the McCarthy era: an SMU prof had published an anti-Communist screed with tones of anti-Semitism, my father responded with a critique in one of his publications, and the professor tried to get him fired and succeeded in getting him and colleague Margaret Hartley up before an tribunal by University officials on charges of disloyalty. They were cleared.

But I was reminded of countless other incidences of editorial backbone as when a Methodist bishop complained about the galley proof of a short story containing a good amount of street language. “Bishop,” my father responded, “you don’t talk that way and I don’t talk that way, but the character in this story talks this way so I’m going to publish it.” And he did. He never brought these incidents home and in most cases he never even mentioned them.

He was my own editor a few times for high school papers, critiquing punctuation or grammatical decisions which I felt to be negotiable. I never remember him actually suggesting I change the meaning of any passage but I know he did—so subtly that I did not realize he was doing it or so persuasively that I thought the change was my idea. In that sense he was the ultimate great client: standing up for the integrity of the editorial matter because his responsibility was to make it as good as it could be while retaining the author’s voice.

Thank you Daddy. Rest in peace, Allen Maxwell.

Happy birthday to my Prius battery

Marketing readers of this blog are probably unaware that there is a very active ongoing discussion, in the form of comments on several posts and reposting on car enthusiast blogs, about how long batteries should last in hybrid cars and what the manufacturer should do if they die prematurely.

Two years ago last month, the battery in my 2001 Prius quit, 8 months out of warranty but with just 70,000 miles on the car. I paid $3700 to replace it and lobbied Toyota Corporate to refund it without success. Two years ago this month, the good people at San Francisco Toyota informed me that they had gotten authorization through their retail dealer rep to refund the replacement cost in full.

I hope the two research physicians who purchased my Prius soon after that are enjoying their car; I expect it has many more years on its new battery. I hope that Toyota has gotten enough positive consideration to repay their investment in my vehicle; I expect that they have. And I hope that Doug Donnellan, who was then the manager of SF Toyota, has gotten further promotions; he is the kind of proactive, go-out-on-a-limb executive every company needs in these times, or any times.

If you want to know more about my Prius battery, the comments at the bottom of this post are a good place to start.

It’s halftime in America

I just about wet myself the other night watching the spot during the Super Bowl. Very gutsy that Chrysler would spend God knows how much to run a 2 minute spot that could only run … during halftime in a single football game. After watching I had tears in my eyes and was about to run out and buy a Chrysler 300.

But reviewing it today a couple of nits. Clint Eastwood does not have the Detroit cred of Eminem, even though “I’ve seen a lot of tough eras, a lot of downturns in my life.” (I wondered if he actually was born in the Motor City and looked it up. No: San Francisco, CA.) And honestly as the spot began I was thinking it was a Clint Eastwood voice imitator (he was there but in shadows) and by the time he showed up I was almost irritated that it really was Clint. And of course the parallel to the Hal Riney “It’s morning in America” Reagan ad was a distraction for anyone who remembered.

The observation that “the fog of division, discord, and blame made it hard to see what lies ahead” was also a calculated risk on timing which I think misfired. Carl Rove says that’s a political attack which is for sure protesting too much. The producers were simply going for a chord of empathy, assuming we would be in the midst of hard times when they made the spot but the economy seems to be looking up so it doesn’t ring true for at least one viewer.

So, I still prefer Eminem’s spot last year. But I still think I will buy a Chrysler in the form of that little Fiat that morphs into a giant woman dressed in red and black in another Super Bowl spot.

How to be a great client

I recently started working with a great new client. The relationship is so enjoyable and productive, I wonder why all client/creative relationships can’t be this way. If you are a client, here are a few things you can do to make this happen.

1. Care about your job. If you treat your advertising as just another mechanical process that you get paid for, it’s hard for your copywriters to get enthusiastic. The truth is that what you are doing for your company is terribly important because, like Roy Chitwood says, nothing happens until somebody sells something and your efforts are what make the sales begin. Believe in what you are doing and it will show and I will work harder for you.

2. Get your shit together. Nothing is more disheartening to me than to have a bunch of stuff dumped on me that my client hasn’t read and isn’t familiar with when I ask questions. If it’s not important enough for you to review and organize the source material, why should it be important to me? That overused word “curate” is relevant here. Like a museum director, you should curate the research documents so I can discover each one in proper context. And, needless to say, you should include a creative brief.

3. Set realistic schedules. Given enough money, yes I can meet that tomorrow morning deadline. But there’s a hidden price for that. I need time to explore options and if you always begin with an impossibly short deadline (doesn’t matter whether it is your own disorganization or client pushback, the net effect is the same) you will lose valuable creative development time while paradoxically paying more. It’s also much less satisfying for the copywriter or art director because they know the finished product might have been better if they had more time.

4. Provide constructive feedback. Don’t say you don’t like it. Don’t unilaterally rewrite it. Instead, tell me in as much detail as you can what you think of my copy and why. This particular great client couldn’t decide which of my headline approaches (long vs short) worked best so they put them in layout so we could both look at them together. Now I am falling all over myself trying to do the best possible revision.

5. Defend the work. Don’t come back and tell me we have to water down a marketing statement or replace strong copy with jargon because “sales won’t accept that” or “this may be too edgy for our reader”. You clearly outlined the project and any sacred cows in the creative brief (you did write that, yes?) and if the end product follows that direction your responsibility is to sell it internally. It is my personal hunch that push-back from sales is a sign of fear: they aren’t confident in their ability to do their job so every effort to support them is looked at with suspicion. Don’t get sucked into this zero sum game. Confidently defend your marketing decisions because you believe in them. (See #1 above.)

6. Say thank you. If you follow the above steps you will get a pretty amazing creative result so don’t forget to say you are grateful. And don’t be surprised if your creatives are just as grateful and continue to do their best work on your behalf.

7. Pay on time.

Wrapping up CES 2012

The highlight of my final day at CES 2012 was a visit to Eureka Park, the area at the Venetian dedicated to new products and startup companies. Here are a few items of particular interest.

Cubelets. Designed for kids to learn programming, Cubelets are magnetic blocks that can be snapped together to produce complex reactions. For example, the brightness block determines the available amount of light and turns on the flashlight block, then the distance block tells the driving block to move the whole structure down the table. You can watch a really silly video since my photo didn’t work out well, and you can also preorder an (expensive) prototype kit to ship in March.

Postcard on the Run. An iPhone or Android app that lets you choose a photo, write a message (including your written signature) then mail it as a physical postcard to an address in your address book. I tried it out and the app was going to charge me $1.99 (including a scratch n sniff layer at 50 cents extra) which is not a bad price compared to buying and mailing a postcard from the post office.

Twykin.com. These guys are doing a mashup of bulletin boards, FAQs, Wikipedia type user written articles and using it to develop as a test case the world’s first crowdsourced customer service application. You’ll have to trust me (and I will have to trust them) on this one since their developer was in an accident just before CES but they promised to get back to me and I’ll do a full piece at some point in the near future.

Blippar. Instead of shooting a QR code with your smartphone that takes you to a website, the Blippar app allows you to interact directly with an augmented reality application. The examples shown by this UK company include a ketchup label that allowed you to turn the label into pages you can flip through, and a retail page in which you can order directly from the app.

SurfEasy. This is a USB dongle that fits into a credit card-size carrier. On it are your browser preferences and passcodes with bank-level encryption so you can just plug into a public device and go right to work. There’s no storage on the device, but it comes with 2 GB of cloud storage. It’s a bit pricey at $60, but solves a problem for folks who use public computers in what looks like a complete and well thought-out execution.

That’s it for CES 2012. See you next year.

Bests of CES, 2012

Best marketing: Samsung Note. This is the new device that’s small enough to use as a phone yet big enough to use as a tablet, soon to be announced for AT&T. (I want one!) To show off its capabilities, they had two artists doing portraits of showgoers using the special pen that comes with the device, and all their advertising features examples of these portraits.

Kodak at CES 2012 — Kodak "Sharing Solutions" at CES 2012

Best “dead man walking” imitation: Kodak. Even though they’re openly attempting to sell off their units to avoid bankruptcy, they were in their exhibit space maybe because they’d already paid for it. There was only a single wall of cameras, which they now call “sharing solutions”; more irony, they’ve now started packaging their inkjet cartridges in boxes that look like Tri-X film boxes.

LG 3D TV at CES 2012 — Intro to the LG display area at CES 2012

Best commitment to 3D TV: LG. They ask you to put on the glasses before you enter their space, and leave them on because there’s just one 3D TV after another. I still predict a short lifetime for this fad and think it will wither once everybody who wants a 3D TV has one. The summer Olympics are being broadcast in 3D, I learned at the show, so that will be a tipping point one way or the other.

Best waste of time: Justin Bieber. He was standing doing something in the middle of the Vody robotics booth, and a huge press of people were seeing nothing except the back of each other’s heads. The C/Net camera, a few rows back, did capture a wisp of his famous locks. Meanwhile, other showgoers were actually learning something about technology.

New York Deli at LVCC — New York Deli has great sandwiches

Best food without leaving the show: Uncle Joel & Darryl’s New York Deli, toward the back of the central hall. Real deli sandwiches with a pickle and excellent cole slaw and potato salad, for just a couple bucks more than you’d pay on the street.

Casio Bluetooth Watch demo — Casio watch tells you when your phone is ringing.

Best example of missing the boat: Casio. As the world switched to smartphones, they made a strategic decision to stick with watches. New this year, a Bluetooth watch that will alert you when a call is coming in. Hey, I have a phone for that.

Panasonic kicks eco-butt at CES 2012

If you are at CES, be sure to check out the “eco ideas” section of the Panasonic exhibit. Once again, they score with irresistible concepts and catchphrases for ideas that may or may not ever become practical but should be. A racecar that rockets across the Australian outback under its own solar power, and beats its nearest competitor by an hour. A planned community in Singapore built within a solar/wind farm on the site of an old Panasonic factory, so energy is immediately available for use without being stored or transmitted. An electric car that is recharged wirelessly, and warms its passengers with its onboard heat pump.

Panasonic 3D screen at CES — Panaonic's 3D screen, in which the image is projected on building blocks

Panasonic demo queen Joey Lao — The indefatigable Joey Lao

Be sure you get your demo from the indefatigable Joey Lao, who was featured a couple of years in my still-popular post on the heat pump washer/dryer. And don’t miss the showcase video, a tour de force in which the screen itself, not the camera, is in 3D.

Marketing Makeover at CES 2012

One of my favorite events at CES is Steven J. Leon’s Showstoppers. Tech companies large and small rent a 6-foot booth space for 4 hours so they can convince reporters and bloggers (this is a press event) how cool they are in hopes of getting coverage.

A real niche product — Some of these companies, like Twonky, have a real niche product.

Because I’m here to study how companies market themselves, I like to look at how good they are in their signage. With 100+ companies in a large ballroom, I’m not going to listen to everybody’s elevator pitch. It’s amazing how many just put up a sign with their name, giving no clue what they do. Others have slogans or graphics that are edgy or plays on words but, again, give no clue what the product or service is.

I’d like to do a marketing makeover of some of these guys, similar to the lightening rounds I used to do with Carol Worthington Levy at DMA events. Someone would bring up their catalog or mail pack or ad and we’ll have to fire off quick ideas to make it better. Some of our ideas were better than others, but it’s amazing how many obvious improvements are hiding in plain sight.

One company that could use a makeover is YurBuds, with its “earbuds that won’t fall out.” Please, don’t make them look like implants. Don’t make them red like blood. Don’t make the cords look like blood dripping from your ears. Change those things and your product will be less creepy and sell better.

Another candidate is EmPower (note unhelpful jargony name), a company that makes eyeglasses with built in electronics in the earpiece that changes them from reading glasses to distance glasses at the touch of a finger. Invisible bifocal glasses that do this cost hundreds; these are $12 and available already at 1200 opticians. Nice story… but they miss the boat with a marketing display that features the fact they are glasses. Yes, we know that. It is the hidden electronics that makes them different. To demonstrate that, show them as anything BUT glasses.

Nicole Messier demos Kogeto panoramic camera.

The only truly new product I saw was from Kogeto: a camera that attaches to your iPhone and will take a panoramic photo which you can then upload to Facebook or a similar app; the viewer uses a slider to move the image around. It was so cool that, true story, I did not even notice it was my pal Nicole Messier doing the demo. Their signage could use some work however.